Instead of traditional New Year’s resolutions, I like to take a moment at the end of each year and look back on where I was five years ago. Sort of a “then and now” reflection to see if I have grown or become stagnant in certain areas. One year is good but there is something about a five year mark that is significant. As a person who loves a challenge if I’ve stayed in the same place five years a row without any growth, then I’ve found my challenge for the upcoming year.
So reflecting back to December 31, 2009 and comparing to December 31, 2014:
Relationships have been a biggie! Five years ago, I was in a blossoming relationship with my now husband. We were beginning to make plans for our future together as a couple and family. We had no idea the challenge that was waiting around the corner for us in February of 2010. My husband was diagnosed with chronic myelogenous leukemia. Once his treatments began I took to heart the words of one of his doctors, “Just live your life.”. At the time I was struggling with the idea of facing a lifetime with that damn dark leukemia cloud over our heads forever. The fear was absolutely paralyzing. The wonderful lesson for me was that by taking those words to heart, turning that fear into courage…the kind that makes you feel like you can scale Mount Everest and using it to propel me forward. I have been astounded at the wonderful gifts we’ve been blessed with since. We decided to add to our family with a beautiful baby boy and just celebrated our sixth Christmas together as a family. Embracing this challenge has been a HUGE defining moment in my life.
As for other relationships in my life with family and friends. I’ve always been blessed with awesome friends. I still have many but the difference five years later is the number who are in my inner circle. Very few and that has been liberating. Whether it has been letting go of a relationship where I was the only one doing the listening, the visiting, the traveling for, basically the only one supporting the person and rarely if ever getting any support in return. These relationships are still in my life but have now been lovingly placed in an outer circle where I can still love and support but are no longer my priority.
Work to Home to Personal Fulfillment on the heels of that turning point in 2009/2010 my life has changed tremendously. From leaving a job where it was not uncommon for me to spontaneously burst into tears sometime during my daily commute to taking on the challenge to starting my own business so I would be in control of my destiny to fulfilling my challenge to visit a new place I’ve never been every year life continues to amaze me at how brilliant and vivid it is when you step outside and embrace it.
My top challenge for 2015 is simply Me. I’m knocking on the door of the big 4-0 very soon, I’ve been a Mommy for the past 19 years, I work really hard dammit, I love the people in my life incredibly and intensely so it’s now a little time for Me to get some love and attention. I will be fulfilling promises to myself to focus on fitness, to step into that new role my team and I have created for my business, to slow down and remember to breathe and let all negative thoughts float out of my mind and away instead of gripping onto them like they’re some type of life preserver.
Overall, I am happy with my progress over the past five years. I am thankful for a wonderful 2014 and look forward to every precious moment in 2015.
I hope each of you take a moment to reflect on the past, be thankful for the present and look forward to your future in 2015!